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These are my thoughts, sketchy they may be, but I’ve stripped myself of the journal and I’m doing my best to post my thoughts to The Journey. If you are joining me now at this point this may sound like gobbly-guck but I’ve been working at these things for over three years now, dedicated to reclaiming my magickal path. Follow along, chirp in as you feel, please don’t hesitate to contribute. (I will douse “flames” and kick trolls in a heartbeat. ūüôā )

As I’ve been told, so I am thinking, that I know this work: Shamanism for the self, for the work I do.

I’ve read through the Temple of Shamanic Witchcraft off an on, between the book review, art, and work. I have to say that I have found a lot of useful information, knowledge that fills in the gaps in what I know. I’ve had great conversation here on The Journey, at and with friends and a few fellow magickal folk.

Today as I read through much of the book, I realized that I do know this material, in part by practice (interpreted) and in part by… well I don’t know but I know it. Thinking this brings me back to my first Re-dedication ritual where I met much of what shaped my path today. In that first re-dedication I experienced the following:

After a ritual cleansing and consecration of my self, body, mind, and spirit, in the Inner Temple, I found a doorway just beyond the temple. A passage to a hill marked with stones, much like Stonehenge, and there by a fire in the center sat two deities: an Earth Mother (Gaia-like) and a horned God.

I spoke my intentions to them to re-dedicate myself to my path. I spoke my intention aloud and waited for their answer amidst the stones. There under the moon, within my sacred space, the God brought forward a host of voices. Spirits. It is hard to describe this moment… It was as if the cry of a thousand healers, witches, medicine people and folk passed through me. I cannot say how long ¬†I was in this place but I felt the memory pass knowledge and history to me. There is no time or space to detail it all to you now. I don’t know that I could, but I had a grounded sense of all that passed into me, settled into the blood and bone of myself.

There was anger, hurt, torture and death. There was also a gathered sense of purpose, as if I gifted with something important, the role and title of Witch. In that moment I was both humbled and honored. I wrote in my journal that it was a lot like a massive download of information and feeling, compacted into moments.

When I came out of this Initiation it was as if my brow was alight with a flaming pentagram that wreathed my head in light and fire. My arms emblazoned with bracers, etched in knots and more pentacles, aflame. Ah but so were my legs in old world bracers as well, adorned the same.

I was alight!

Since that time so much has changed (significantly) and often “information” just pops in. Remembering what I have not recalled in some time, or before in this lifetime.

It’s an honest journal entry and I feel I have to spell it out. I’m about to complete my Shamanic initiation / re-dedication. For me it is an attument to water but other elements come into play, ideas, images, and notations that I have to scribble down for myself so that I gather what I need before I pass through the vortex of this door.

Some of these ideas are tools.

I don’t have a cauldron. Yes, smack me. “What sort of Witch are you???” But really I have used cups, vessels, “lota’s” and pottery. Until now the use of this elemental tool has seemed strange, or replaceable with substitutes. At this point I cannot see how I can continue with this underworld symbol.

Other things have popped in as well, things to do, things to find, and this is my laundry list of items and tasks to bring together before I do the next re-dedication:

  1. Cauldron: as I said this seems (now) vital in its purpose, use, and significance. No more kitchen bowls. Yes, my dear cooking pots, you will be spared the flames of rights, I will now seek out a cauldron.
  2. Spirit Relationships: I felt that I was covering this pretty well. I’m a daily ritual person in the morning where I say hello to the four directions and my guardians, guides, and the avatar’s of the directions. Including the guides that are with me beyond the four corners. I am drawn to strengthen these ties, this family of spirits around me. I’m thinking the following:
    1. Journey work to each guardian for insight. I will detail as I can.
    2. A symbolic tool associated¬†with each totem, tether, or object that represents each force, gathered together in a bag and ritually blessed. There is memory niggling at me. I gave away a bag like this a long time ago, when I had no boundary, when I was young. It’s time to reclaim that power and strengthen these ties.
    3. Shield: Highlighted¬†at the end of the book is the instructions to build a shield, detailed with representations of your spiritual allies. Artist aside, I’m drawn towards the making of this spirit shield. (To be made after I do the journey work).
  3. I need to connect with a group. That’s a bit of a challenge for me at this phase because I’m following the course of my path and I’m not a traditionalist in any sense of the word… tho ¬†I have deep reservations about a lot of the “eclectic” groups out there, mostly because I’m a solitary Witch. Yet the call is there.

Writing out these thoughts is helpful but also important. I’ve challenged myself to come out as much as possible here at The Journey, to bring you along on my quest. I hope to detail each of these experiences and my eventual re-dedication before moving onto the next three attunements.

In the bigger picture I feel that this work brings more to my goal, the purpose of the site and my work, to serve, to create, to make.

Thoughts, ideas, advise? I know I have some good loving connections out there, wise and chatty. Hit me up.

Be well,



I had a rocky morning but Wednesdays are turning out to be¬†perfect ¬†hours to do a lot of the work I need to do around the house. Though I am “on call” and need to stick around the area for office needs at the Rowan, I get to work from home and that is phenomenal without the added pressures of dramas now past.

Lists have become essential for me, lists and timers. I really can maximize a day with all the various things I have to carry out in what seems to be hours that are becoming shorter and shorter. NO! Who is the time bandit?!

This morning I had 6 items on my “ta-dah!” list:

  1. Book Review
  2. Email to someone I had a dream about
  3. Meditation on Yesod / The Lunar Path
  4. continuing meditation on the Three Worlds, followed by
  5. contemplation of the Runes accompanied with vibrating the Rune names. More Runic notes
  6. Find the name of a Hindu Deity.

This list does not include my mundane tasks, but they don’t really apply to the post, so consider them there but passed in mention.

The Lunar Path.

Anyway, the reason I am writing is that my meditation was interesting in detail and image. I am still feeling out the experience in detail.

I light a candle for the West and turned off all the lights, just me, the candle and the morning light. I smudged the space, with a blessing and my intention for the journey-work, “an harm none”. I brought with me the items that called out to me, three quartz crystal points, and a 2 pound hunk of selenite.

Trixie, by her secret name, came to the bed and lay next to me, curled up but watching as I went within.

I entered into a relaxed state,  body, mind, and soul. I counted down deep, deeper, there and entered my sacred space. A vast tree that is composed of stars and light in the heights, and shadow and earthy things in the depths.

A door appeared for me, as is the usual when I call for it and I entered into my Inner Temple.

Inside everything has changed. This is unusual. For the last 20 years everything has been pretty much the same. A canopied bed for deeper work, a doorway to other realms that I, and only I, may open. I balcony that overlooks the universe, among other things. This time when I entered there was a square, corners twisted into circles in gold light, on a black featureless floor. This was really quite striking. I’ve come to this place for so long and this was a dramatic change.

I sat within the square, I felt the four directions. I called upon my Guardian and asked that he be with me for the journey I was about to do. I also asked that the meaning of a message that had been left for me earlier in the week be made clear: The Lunar Path.

A passage appears in the darkness by the golden square, between pillar or trees there is an indigo-way, a road marked¬†with the words “Lunar Path”. This path bends to the left around an unseen curve into another place. I rise and as ¬†I do a man, nude, comes out of the darkness and close to me. He is between me and the door and he is asking that I touch him. He is erect and the feeling transfers to me, at the Second Chakra, and vibrates through my body until I am tingling. He is laughing and than his entire form is almost immortalized as a semi-transparent figure through which I must pass… and so I do.

The tingling sensation becomes a vibration and the indigo path I walk opens up into a moonlit world of trees and obscure things. I feel my Guardian there with me and it tells me¬†to focus on the message. As I do another tree appears int he distance, this one is more wild and fantastic looking than my own. Something out of Pandora (Avatar ref.) and a milky light forms between us. This light becomes a woman, a Goddess, unfolding as if from a Lily. ¬†She is full of some of joy and there is an increase in the body vibration as I start to shift. That’s the only way I can describe it. My substance became more vibratory and I felt as if I was dreaming. I think you know the feeling, it’s a different state of mind, this time I am conscious instead of resting. I feel denser. This is a new level or reality. I must transform myself to journey here.

The Goddess reaches out and plucks the three quartz crystals that I had taken with me in the physical to meditate. She laughs and pops them into her mouth. I note that she is a bit translucent and I can see the stones pass through her, released from her body as if birthed in a milky substance and full of vibrating light. She hands them back to me. I place them on my Second Chakra. Simultaneously I feel them beneath my hands, on the large piece of Selenite, also on my Swadhisthana.

The nude man is again transposed across everything, erect, arms flung wide. The Goddess is gone, she is enormous in the distance, like a sliver of lunar light. I am walking on the earth of this plane, it splashes like water.

I sit with the stones and I feel for the meaning. There is a cord like a red-orange electric tentacle that is touching my hands and it is waving about. I feel as if I must straighten the cord and so as I think it, it happens. Tiny people along the cord, like Fairy, move along with me. SNAP! The energy courses along my crown, across the brow, down my face like webs of paint and along my hands. I hear this is your power.

I vibrate deeper and this plane begins to warp around my hands in circles, within circles, and I feel the voice of the quartz against the Selenite. I am clearing them of something, some connection that does not serve me. They are pure. I hear again, this is your power, and the red-orange energy, witchy, old, of earth, and sky, blossom and bone. I stay there and feel it until I than feel the call to return.

Runic Toning.

I move my way back across the path but something happens and I appear at an ocean where the moon is now reflecting on the water, calm, soft waves, smooth sand, a woman singing. I think the sound of the music playing affected the journey but it was really perfect so I went with it.

On the beach I felt the four Runes I had worked on come up in the metaphysical queue. So there I sat in the sand.

A ring of crimson light, glowing with the Futhark, spins about me. The red glow cast a strong light. I pull out the runes in the order that we have studied: Feoh / Uruz / Thurisaz / Os.

With each rune I draw out, I tone (aloud) the name of the rune.





At the end of each toning I sit with each Runes vibration.

Feoh feels like the Gold light of the Universe that is within each of us. It is the light expressed, given, emanating from me. It is the magick.

Uruz feels like the animal lust, the nature of beasts, the power of the wild and calls to be brought in, merged, touched. For a few minutes I sit with the sensation as I realize the power of Uruz to heal and “something” guides the Rune towards my chest where I feel the effects of a medication (cold) are lifted and shifted into a new feeling.

Thurisaz gives me some incredible images, and as had been mentioned, they were tough. I see hurt. Trouble. I even see war and fights. I feel the piercing nature of Thurisaz and I accept it. Part of me wants to shift the energy to something more harmonious but a voice says, “No. Accept its force as a part of the world”. I do.

The Rune than turns outward, the thorn points away.

Os then comes and my toning becomes quite loud, softening as I reach the ninth calling and I feel a distinct light-blue power behind the Rune. I am waiting on the beach, in the circle of crimson Runes, beneath the moon, in contemplation.

Three Worlds. Three Selves.

I return to the path and exit the Lunar Plane. I find the square once again and shift my vibration back to the inner level of reality as I prepare to come back to this, the earthy plane. Before I do, I have one more task that I must complete as part of the TOSW training, The World Tree Within (Lesson One, Exercise 6)… This goes “different” then I had read. ūüôā

For the past two weeks I have heard, “Three worlds, three bodies” with an interesting knowing that indicated three selves:

  1. Upper or Higher Self
  2. Middle Self
  3. Lower or Underworld Self.

I understand that the exercise was “tree breathing” but what I experienced was totally different. I started breathing in from my body and into the lower world / Underworld Self. There, the feeling, intuitive, Magickal¬†me accepted the breath and at the same time was breathing in and exhaling back to my middles self, my current consciousness. I was in turn breathing and exhaling to my Higher Self who was doing the same until the three breaths were in harmony.

Three inhales. Three exhales, breathing to one another. Three pulses. Three beings. All myself. In the breathing I / we harmonized between the three worlds, the three bodes and it really felt incredible. I still feel amazing. Three points of consciousness and awake at each level.

A note on the forms that I experienced in the lower and upper worlds. Each body that I experienced as myself was different than what I might have expected but they each felt good to me. I trust the sentiment.

The Underworld me was bizarre but comfortable and familiar. Blue skinned, striped black like a tiger and part man (me) and bits of many beasts. Legs human morph down into feet like elephants. Hand sand arms but four legs, like a centaur. Tentacles like squid or Octopus sprouting out from beneath the arms and round the torso. A tail. Eyes wide, yellow, like hunting cats. An erect phallus, spear like. Running through a glowing landscape, stopping and breathing back with instinct, feeling, knowing.

The Upper-world self was equally intriguing. Geometric shapes, within patterns, in gold and white. The “head” I guess you could call it, was like a radiant star composed of fabulous pattern and detail, gold, then white, then gold again. The body like a rain, or storm stopped in downpour, again in gold and white, interwoven in a cascade. The pattern of the head moved, turned, spun, whirled within each layer of its geometry.

I began my meditation at around 9:15. It was 10:45 am when I returned to my wakened self. The stones I carried with me are “heavy” in a very interesting sort of energetic way and one of the quartz points now has a tiny inclusion in it that I had not seen before. Small fracture that looks like the shape of the Lunar Goddess as she unfolded on the horizon.

I don’t get to meditate like this very often. As I said I have full days and at this point it is already 1:00 pm in the afternoon. I have only ¬†hours before I begin class and of course there is dinner to be made, and my little Trixie needs walking. Work needs to be checked on and I have paintings waiting for my fingers and brushes. I don’t feel under a crunch, I call it my “ta-dah!” list because¬†I can do so much. And I’m grateful for the time that I have to do it.

I hope this finds you well, and that you enjoyed the first of my private meditation entries.



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